Week 21: Silent Flower Ritual

<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; mso-fareast-font-family: 'Times New Roman';">Welcome to week 21 of our "52 traditions/rituals in 52 weeks".</span><br /><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0cm 0cm 0pt; text-align: justify;"></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0cm 0cm 0pt; text-align: justify;"><span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; mso-fareast-font-family: 'Times New Roman';"><br /></span><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://encrypted-tbn2.gstatic.com/images?q=tbn:ANd9GcQve0knoBfCg-fSm8DX7EOKqq0HlS3ITGcLchleLU4RBwHxdN462Q" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><img border="0" src="https://encrypted-tbn2.gstatic.com/images?q=tbn:ANd9GcQve0knoBfCg-fSm8DX7EOKqq0HlS3ITGcLchleLU4RBwHxdN462Q" /></span></a></div><span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; mso-fareast-font-family: 'Times New Roman';">The silent flower ritual is one of the simplest and most basic rituals that may be included in a wedding ceremony, but it’s significance and emotional depth are long remembered.<o:p></o:p></span></div><span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0cm 0cm 0pt; text-align: justify;"><span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; mso-fareast-font-family: 'Times New Roman';">The silent flower ritual brings significance to the roles of the mothers on this special day, that may otherwise go unspoken and to all that they have contributed in the lives of the couple present. In nurturing, loving and caring for each of them and in being there to share this special day with them.<o:p></o:p></span></div><span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0cm 0cm 0pt; text-align: justify;"><span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; mso-fareast-font-family: 'Times New Roman';">Once the guests are assembled and the groom and celebrant are waiting for the bride, the entrance music begins and the bride enters carrying her bouquet with 2 loose long stem flowers. As she approaches her groom on her father’s (or whoever is escorting her) arm, she lets go of him and walks silently over to her soon to be mother in law and hands her one of the flowers, giving her a kiss on the cheek. She then walks over to her own mother handing her a flower also and giving her a kiss on the cheek.<o:p></o:p></span></div><span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0cm 0cm 0pt; text-align: justify;"><span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; mso-fareast-font-family: 'Times New Roman';">No words are said during the ritual and the bride then returns to her escort’s arm and continues to her groom.<o:p></o:p></span></div><span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0cm 0cm 0pt; text-align: justify;"><span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; mso-fareast-font-family: 'Times New Roman';">The ritual, though silent, is very meaningful and brings a tear to the eyes of guests and of course the mothers.  It is a truly wonderful way of honouring the mothers role in the lives of the couple and their importance on this day. The mothers are always very pleased, particularly when they are not aware that it is going to take place.<o:p></o:p></span></div><span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span><span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; mso-fareast-font-family: 'Times New Roman';">The Wedding Gurus<o:p></o:p></span><br /><span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0cm 0cm 0pt; text-align: justify;"><span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; mso-fareast-font-family: 'Times New Roman';">xxx</span><br /><span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "Arial","sans-serif"; mso-fareast-font-family: 'Times New Roman';"></span><br /></span><span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; mso-fareast-font-family: 'Times New Roman';"><em>For other ways to include your mums please see our post "</em><a href="http://theweddinggurus.blogspot.com.au/2011/09/what-about-mothers-this-is-area-that-i.html" target="_blank"><em>What about the Mothers?</em></a><em>"</em></span></div>

Week 21: Silent Flower Ritual

Welcome to week 21 of our "52 traditions/rituals in 52 weeks". The silent flower ritual is one of the simplest and most basic ritu...

Read more »

What about the Mothers?

<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0cm 0cm 0pt;"><div style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjEf7mQriFvWMi6jHvn0Cm8X49H_gwXXyks_Qxd8LFEwcPNYRN2L4DZM26SdYmTCSkFQFn6GYL7La-YtdY0SPPVE1wubAq0r6f5GvwLORI3P1OpIgAGMzqo3fi-lMNM9jbZb_Li-aqSC1GO/s1600/mother+of+the+bride.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; cssfloat: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" kca="true" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjEf7mQriFvWMi6jHvn0Cm8X49H_gwXXyks_Qxd8LFEwcPNYRN2L4DZM26SdYmTCSkFQFn6GYL7La-YtdY0SPPVE1wubAq0r6f5GvwLORI3P1OpIgAGMzqo3fi-lMNM9jbZb_Li-aqSC1GO/s1600/mother+of+the+bride.jpg" /></a><span style="font-family: "Microsoft PhagsPa", "sans-serif"; font-size: 9pt;">This is an area that I truly feel passionate about bringing to peoples attention. At nearly every ceremony I conduct my heartstrings are pulled when I see the mothers of the bride and groom sitting (or standing) in their beautiful outfit, hair all done, often with tears in their eyes, left to watch the father walk his daughter down the aisle – or in the parents of the grooms case, have no part to play at all. This is something I would love to see changed in modern day weddings and I must say some couples make a point of finding some way to pay tribute to the mothers, but for so many of us we are just so caught up in the ‘usual’ way things are done we often don’t think about what is actually important to us most.</span></div></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; margin: 0cm 0cm 0pt;"><br /><div style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none;"><span style="font-family: "Microsoft PhagsPa", "sans-serif"; font-size: 9pt;">I know that sometimes relationships are strained with parents or even non-existent so it is not always something that couples want to do. In those situations that is absolutely understandable but I have often chatted to mums who are very close with their daughters and who are felling a bit sad about the fact that they didn’t get to ride down with them or feel that sense of absolute pride side by side with their baby on the biggest day of her life. It brings a tear to my eye just thinking about it. </span></div><div style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none;"><br /></div><div style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none;"><br /></div><div style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none;"><span style="font-family: "Microsoft PhagsPa", "sans-serif"; font-size: 9pt;">With one daughter and two sons of my own I have a very good grasp of just how much of my time, love and attention I devote to them every minute of every day. As many mothers do I often think about my daughters wedding, picking out dresses and flowers etc when she grows up, but I’m being honest when I tell you that I can’t help but feel sad that I will have to stand on the sidelines and watch her father, friends and husband to be and his friends stand side by side with her on one of the biggest days of her life. I feel a bit cheated. (in advance!). And to add insult to injury I will even have less of a role on my son’s big days unless they decide to find a special part for me. I know it all sounds very ‘woe is me’, but these are the most special people in my life and if a best friend can get upset about not getting to be a bridesmaid then surely I can feel a bit left out too!</span></div><br /><span style="font-family: "Microsoft PhagsPa", "sans-serif"; font-size: 9pt;">It is funny to me that there are so many traditions in modern ceremonies that have forged through, pushing aside the old ways and yet this is just something that seems to remain, the institution that a father should give away his daughter to her new husband. It really struck me one day at a ceremony where the bride had only recently (like a month before) lost her mother and it was very hard for her not to have her there to see her get married. In planning the ceremony we decided that it would be really special to have a picture of her mother on the signing table at the front and as she walked up to stand beside the groom. She would first walk over to the table, place a kiss on the photo and light the candle. It really was lovely and evoked a lot of emotion amongst the guests, but at the time I couldn’t help thinking that there was more acknowledgement for that mother who had passed away than there was for a mother who is actually present and desperate to play a part.</span><br /><br /><span style="font-family: "Microsoft PhagsPa", "sans-serif"; font-size: 9pt;">So I know I have probably ranted a little in this post because of that fact that this is something I feel strongly about but if it inspires even just one of you to find a way to include your mum or make her feel special and stand out from just being like all of the other guests, then I feel that my work here is done.</span><br /><br /><span style="font-family: "Microsoft PhagsPa", "sans-serif"; font-size: 9pt;">If you want to find a way to include your mum and are stuck for ideas or have a great idea that you yourself used, please leave a comment.</span><br /><br /><span style="font-family: "Microsoft PhagsPa", "sans-serif"; font-size: 9pt;">Regards</span><br /><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0cm 0cm 0pt;"><span style="font-family: "Microsoft PhagsPa", "sans-serif"; font-size: 9pt;"></span></div></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0cm 0cm 0pt;"><b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><span style="color: #b2a1c7; font-family: "Segoe Script", "sans-serif"; font-size: 11pt; mso-themecolor: accent4; mso-themetint: 153;"></span></b><br /><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0cm 0cm 0pt;"><b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><span style="color: #7030a0; font-family: "Segoe Script", "sans-serif"; mso-fareast-language: EN-AU;"><span style="font-size: small;">Susan </span></span></b></div></div>

What about the Mothers?

This is an area that I truly feel passionate about bringing to peoples attention. At nearly every ceremony I conduct my heartstrings are pul...

Read more »